How to Get an A+ in Parent – Teacher Conferences

MJ Dougherty, LSW-C

Is there anything that used to strike fear in your fifth-grade heart quite like the words, “Parent-Teacher Conference”?  Even if you were one of the Brady Kids, you were pretty sure that your teacher was going to reveal to your mother all of the deep, dark secrets that you were praying she’d never find out.  Well, now the tables have turned, and your own little darling is quaking in his boots.  Ok, relax.  Chances are good that you’re not going to hear anything earth shattering, but here are some ideas that will make a parent-teacher conference, if not pleasant, at least not your fifth-grade nightmares come back to haunt you.

Try these tips:

• Be prepared.  Talk to your son or daughter before you meet with the teacher and try to find out what they feel is going well.  Get specific details.  Ask your child what her favorite and least favorite classes are, and why (and no recess does not count). 

• Be an informed parent.  Become familiar with the subject matter your children is studying, and have samples of his homework or test papers with you, especially if you have specific concerns about your child’s performance.

• Be ready to hear that you child is not perfect.  A teacher should be able to identify areas in which your child needs to focus more attention without meeting resistance.  Whether you agree with the teacher’s opinion or not, ask to see examples of work that do not meet the teacher’s expectations.  Ask for specific ways in which you could offer support to your child in these areas.

• Be aware that the teacher is probably pressed for time, especially if he or she has more parents scheduled for conferences following yours.  If you or the teacher have concerns that cannot be addressed adequately in the allotted time, be ready to schedule another meeting in the near future to brainstorm for solutions.

• If you want to know more about how your child is doing, ask to visit the classroom, especially during times when your child’s most challenging subjects are being taught.  If you have the time, offer to volunteer in the classroom.  Let the teacher know that your are invested in your child’s education.

• Look for solutions, not just problems.  Show the teacher that you are willing to work with them to develop a plan that will put or keep your child on the right track.  Develop short-term as well as long-term goals to help your child.  Your long-term goal might be that your child raises her grade in reading.  Your short-term goal could be to spend thirty minutes on reading each night for the next month.

Before you know it, the dreaded parent-teacher conference will be over, and you will probably emerge with some good ideas and insights.  You may not even have to think about it again until next year’s conference.  So now, Brady Kid, go home, relax, and see if Alice made any cookies for an after-school snack.